I’ve kinda been thinking why my blog has in recent years become deserted over time (by me, that is). Not that anyone is asking me to write more, I just think it’ll be better for my mental health if I do (a topic I have touched upon in previous iterations of this blog)
I think the reason I write a lot less now than I used to back when I was living in Japan, at least the most obvious reason, is that Japan is pretty compared to everywhere else. And it was different. For my given audience of Taiwanese and Canadian friends, it had the potential of being interesting. Now my life largely bores even me, and I can’t really consistently write about my boring life of work and … I dunno, what else is there? My life has become monotonous.
Another crucial reason is my poor time management. My time isn’t spent on anything useful in particular, aside from work and spending time with the girl. I donate most of the rest of my time to reading stuff on the internet. I hope I do make more time for writing though.
A perhaps equally important reason is that I have been censoring myself. I find myself going back and editing/deleting half-developed ideas more often now. I’d like to see it as my maturing, since I now have the ability to be disgusted by myself when I write incoherent crap, and also because I have become sensitive to what others might think. Back in Japan, no one in my immediate personal life read my blog, so it was easy to make seemingly harmless jokes about work and the people around me without worrying about being misinterpreted or judged for what I write. Now I have to worry about offending people. Usually self-censoring works like deleting photos; you only end up posting the good stuff. However in my case, if I don’t post the crappy stuff, there’s nothing to post, and my mental health suffers. So I’m gonna care a little less now (and well nobody’s really reading this shit anyways), and just ramble here from time to time. I think having a channel for stress relief is more important than the delicate feelings of the two of you who read my blog. Not that I will bitch at people, no, I’m a nice guy now🙂